Metric Halo
Engineer Beautification Unit
Metric Halo Engineer Beautification Unit
Like any other professional mastering engineer the Audiobomber always had problems to convince clients of his warming character and nature. It took the Audiobomber many years to find out, that something was actually wrong with his charisma and general aura. This is, of course, a shortcoming that can only be fixed with the Metric Halo-unit.

The Metric Halo Engineer Beautification unit boosts the appearance of a mastering engineer in a very subtle and slight way. Outbursts of negative energy and aura are immediately suppressed with a negativity notch-filter, featuring a slope of up to 126dB suppression per kilo-volt of negative energy or aura. Simultaneously the Metric Halo-device can project halos over your head. See for yourself ...

before after

The Metric Halo Engineer Beautification Unit also comes with an "angelic impression"-shelfing unit, the 3-Band Angelizer ©, which boosts the "good guy" that dwells in every mastering engineer, giving you a totally angelic and friendly appearance. The Angelizer is capable of angelic-ranges from Minor Saint up to Archangel while the 3 bands-feature allows you to mix up to 3 bands or singer-songwriters in one go, before you have to rinse and re-canonize the unit.

The halo in the picture has a diameter of 40cm, but you can also purchase the Imperial Halo-unit which allows generation of halos in units of inches, feet and yards.